I have no idea why I fell asleep at 7:30 last night, but that probably explains why I was wide awake at 3am. I'm using this extra time to catch up around here.

The first 2 weeks of January were pretty intense for me as I struggled to finish final papers for both classes. Even though I've become more confident in my writing this semester, I still had quite a bit of trouble with them. That just makes it even better, though, that when I got the paper I wrote for Religion class back this week, instead of the lousy grade I was expecting, I saw this written at the top:

A
You grasp one of the key points of this book, that the concept of svadharma may be the concept that best allows Hinduism to adapt to this rapidly changing and globalizing environment. You defend your thesis well. The writing is clear and concise.

I nearly fell out of my chair. I don't know why I can't recognize the quality in my own work... I am convinced that everything I turn in is crap when I submit it, but this semester I've been proven wrong almost every time. I should have my final grades for the term later this week (maybe even later today!). I'm keeping my fingers crossed for more proof.

Getting my two final papers wasn't yet the end of my academic writing. I still had to write an application essay. See, I've been taking classes at the Extension School a la carte, so to speak. That is, I've taken plenty of individual classes, which will (hopefully) all count towards a degree, but I'm not officially in a degree program. I couldn't apply to that until I knocked out the mandatory writing class this past semester. Now that I've gotten it out of the way, I've submitted my application. Sometime in early March, I'll know if I'm accepted to the program. Once I'm in, I'll finally get a student ID, and all of the privileges that go along with it... libraries, gym/track/pool, free shuttle between campuses (I work at the Longwood campus, so essentially free transport between work and school). Also, since I'll be a legit student, maybe I'll finally buy myself a school hat or sweatshirt or something.

By the way, the book I wrote about for Religion class was Samskara: A Rite for a Dead Man by U.R. Anantha Murthy, and the concept of svadharma can be summed up fairly well with this verse from the Bhagavad Gita:

Better one’s own dharma, though imperfectly performed, than the dharma of another well performed. Better is death in the doing of one’s own dharma: the dharma of another is fraught with peril.
(3:55, as translated by Swami Nikhilananda)

I can definitely relate to that sentiment. I've certainly done things my own way these last 10 years or so. Even though my way has sometimes been imperfect, and often not what others sometimes expect from me, my life is so much more meaningful because of it.